I hadn’t thought of myself that way

June 18th, 2015

Something happened this week… twice. Two people I don’t know referred to me as a writer. And it got me thinking.

I hadn’t thought of myself as a writer. Sure, I write these emails to you each week and I hope sometimes they make you laugh or smile … or think. But somehow, despite writing thousands of words month after month, not until this week did I consider that I might be a writer.

Now, I tell you this, not because you need to be a writer too, but rather because I want you to know that sometimes in business, you need to start the doing, in order to eventually get to the doing well. All too often, we put off the doing, waiting until that “someday” when we imagine we’ll be able to do something really well. Not only is that doing it backwards, but what often happens is we don’t do it at all. You need to take specific actions over and over again in order to make your business known and in order to make your business thrive. And sometimes those things might not be something you think you are great at, but you still need to do them… and then at some point you look up from what you’re doing and not only do you have a thriving practice, but you’ve also honed that skill. And others have taken note.

But how do we push ourselves to take those steps to do what we need to in our private practices? How do we move past that internal resistance? And how do we know which steps to take in order to make our practices thrive?

I talked with a therapist today who did several interviews over the last month with agencies. She’s been working in someone else’s practice part time and she is tired of not making enough money… and so she started looking at working for an agency again. And she got offers. But those offers made her take a hard look at the freedom she’d be giving up. And made her reconsider actually doing what she needs to do to build her own practice and make it work financially. That is the kind of wake-up moment I had too. And I chose private practice. I chose to do what it took to make it work… even if that meant doing things that scared me. Even if it meant doing things that I worried I’d look foolish doing (because I thought I wasn’t good enough at them). Even if it meant doing things over and over again that I was scared of and thought I wasn’t good at! I got to a point where I chose to not turn back. Where I decided that I needed to make my future happen. Where I wasn’t willing to back away from what I needed to do just because I was scared.

And I got really clear on Why. Why did I need to do things that I didn’t really want to? Why was it so critical to make my business work? Why was I doing this again? And once I was crystal clear on that, there was really no going back. That is not to say I don’t have my moments of doubt. And I’d be lying to you if I said that building a business doesn’t take work. But the truth is, it has gotten a whole lot easier. I don’t avoid or dread writing anymore. (Although, admittedly, this email and blog were a day late this week.)

As for what those steps are that you need to take (once you get past your internal resistance), that is exactly what I am guiding the current cohort of therapists in the 6-Month Group Intensive through. And it is fun. And it is nice to have other people going through it at the same time – people who also experience resistance, fear, uncertainty… and then to be able to gently remind them of their Why and their mission. That now is part of my Why. And it is totally worth it.